I’m one of those people who can watch the same film multiple times, and I enjoy everything from romantic comedies to dramas – just no horror for me, thanks! Sometimes I read the book first and then watch the movie, other times it’s the other way around. There’s something magical about getting lost in these stories, whether on the page or on the screen, [though I tend to read mostly non-fiction].
This weekend, I revisited one of my all-time favourites, The Fault in Our Stars. The first time I saw it in the cinema, I cried my eyes out – not just a glistening tear rolling down my cheek, but full-on snotty, ugly crying. In public! 😳
The book is beautiful too; I read it after watching the movie. Since then, I’ve watched it five or six times, and this weekend was no different.
Spoiler alert ahead
If you haven’t seen it yet, here’s a spoiler alert: one of the standout moments for me is when the fun-loving Gus gets diagnosed with terminal cancer. Hazel, who carries her own struggles with cancer and relies on an oxygen tank, is worried about him being in pain. She is also worried about how she will cope with his inevitable death. Someone so young, who has fallen head over heels with a boy, who has cancer.
One of the scenes that really stands out for me is when Hazel’s mum says, “You know how to live with pain, you just haven’t figured out how to survive it yet.” In this moment, Hazel is struggling with her emotional and psychological pain rather than physical pain, something she knows quite well.
She feels overwhelmed by the impending loss of Gus, who is deteriorating due to his cancer. Hazel’s mother is trying to provide comfort and encouragement as Hazel grapples with the fear and grief of losing someone she loves deeply. This scene highlights the emotional burden Hazel carries as she faces both her own illness and the pain of watching Gus suffer.
This story brings up so many thoughts, feelings and emotions for me. It has me thinking about young love, friendship, love between parents and children, connection, grief, and loss.
Watching Hazel and Gus’s relationship unfold is a rollercoaster of emotions, highlighting the beauty of their bond and the support they offer each other. Their journey reminds me of how deeply we connect with stories and characters, finding reflections of our own lives in their experiences.
Pain is an inevitable part of life, no matter who you are. Some people seem to get more than their fair share, while others seem to breeze through. This film, and that line in particular, got me thinking about how we all cope with pain and suffering. It’s a universal experience that connects us all in some way.
Humans have been telling stories forever, probably around some sort of campfire. It’s a fundamental part of our evolutionary history. Through storytelling, we’ve always tried to understand and make sense of the world around us. Whether it’s through myths, legends, books, or films, stories help us to process our experiences, share our emotions, and connect with others. They provide a safe space for us to explore difficult topics and feel less alone in our struggles.
The Fault in Our Stars is a perfect example of this. It’s a story that tackles heavy themes with grace and humour, making us laugh and cry while offering a profound commentary on love and loss. It’s these kinds of stories that resonate deeply with us, leaving a lasting impact.
As you go about your week, think about the importance of connection and how we show up for each other.
How do we navigate unbearable pain?
How do we support those we care about in their darkest times?
Reflecting on these questions can help us all understand the power of empathy and the strength found in human connection.
Check out the blog post I wrote for The Therapy Hub The Power of Empathy and Showing Up for Each Other in Times of Pain
So, if you haven’t seen The Fault in Our Stars yet, I highly recommend it – just have some tissues handy!